Post dinner, as all the family members prepare to sleep, my mind wanders and wrestles in the darkness that has long clogged my consciousness .Abnormal pains and restlessness, burden so heavy ....so heavy that it feels as if I am carrying another me on my shoulders.
I stepped out of the living room to call up a close friend and speak my heart with her and Rocky shouts... he has never let me step out of the main gate of our house alone.
I try to walk a bit while talking to my friend and Rocky, who I have locked inside the gate, gets worried, doesnt take his eyes off me..till as long as I am talking, gives me gentle but strict reminders with his precise "woof" to step inside.
He sees the way I limp, he knows the difficulty I have in taking steps and balancing my feet on the ground. He understands the constant fight that my mind and body are engaged in. I cannot exert more so I come inside the gate and sit in the Verandah, still talking to my friend. Rocky takes rounds of the chair I am sitting on and makes sure I am alright. He reads the pain in my eyes, the battle in my heart, the uncertainty and fear in my soul, the desperation of getting better in my smile. He understands it so well, sometimes better than my family and friends. He can't sit and do a pep talk with me, he can't tell me its going to be alright, he cant give me the reassurance that I need all the time.. he just licks my face and hands ...showering all the love in his heart on me...is that not enough ! He cannot express in words but his eyes tell me he cares..all the time.
It's half past 10, I end the conversation with my friend and step inside the house with Rocky and he heaves a happy sigh, wags his tail and sits quietly. I cuddle him, gently kiss his forehead and he licks my neck all over ..telling me how much I mean to him.
I am in my room now and as I type this on my laptop, Rocky is falling asleep beside my bed.
Bear Hug baby Rock !! Sleep tight !!
There cannot be a greater companion than him for me ....not even God !!!
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